Doughboy’s Second Obituary


Pillsbury Doughboy Obituary

Veteran Pillsbury spokesman Pop N. Fresh died yesterday of a
severe yeast infection. He was 71. Known to friends as
Brown-n-Serve, Fresh was an avid gardener and tennis player.

Fresh was buried in one of the largest funeral ceremonies in
recent years. Dozens of celebrities turned out including Mrs.
Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Aunt Jemima,
Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Skippy.

The grave side was piled high with flours as longtime friend
Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Fresh as a man
who “”never knew how much he was kneaded.””

Fresh rose quickly in show business, but his later life was
filled with many turnovers. He was not considered a very
smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes
— conned by those who buttered him up. Still, even as a
crusty old man, he was a roll model for millions.

Fresh is survived by his second wife. They have two children
and another bun in the oven.

The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.

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