• The 2 Wishes Bar Joke

    “TWO WISHES A man walks up to the bar with an ostrich behind him, and as he sits, the bartender asks for their order. The man says, “”I’ll have a beer”” and turns to the ostrich. “”What’s yours?”” “”I’ll have a beer too”” says the ostrich. The bartender pours the beer and says “”That will […]


    “THE SINGING BULLFROG A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, “”If I show you a really good trick, will you give me a free drink?”” The bartender considers it, and then agrees. The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny rat. He reaches into his other pocket and pulls […]

  • Monkey in the bar joke

    “The monkey in the bar joke A man walks into a bar and orders a beer from the bartender. He takes his first sip and sets it down. While he is looking around the bar, a monkey swings down and steals the pint of beer from him before he is able to stop the monkey. […]

  • A chicken walks into a bar Joke

    “A chicken walks into a bar Joke A chicken walks into a bar. The bartender says “”We don’t serve poultry!”” The chicken says “”That’s OK I just want a drink.”” ”

  • The Seven Dwarves and The Pope go into a Bar Joke

    “The Seven Dwarves and The Pope go into a Bar Joke The Pope goes to visit the Seven Dwarfs who are drinking in a bar. As he is finishing his speech on comparative religions, Dopey raises his hand to ask a question. “”Mr. Pope, are there any dwarf nuns in Rome?””. “”No Dopey,”” responds the […]

  • Bears in Bars Joke

    “Bears in Bars Joke There is this bear, right, and he walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says “”Can I have a large Gin and . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . […]

  • Two Hunters Walk into a bar

    “These two hunters enter the bar every day, the first one always carries the skin of an bear, the other one always empty handed. So the second one goes up to the first hunter and asks him how he gets to shoot a bear every day. “”Well, that’s easy””, he replies,”” I just go over […]

  • Bar Flies

    “Bar Flies An Englishman, American, and Irishman, all walk into a bar and order a beer. The bartender hands them there beer, however there are flies in each mug of beer. Well the Englishman pushes the beer aside and says, “”That’s disgusting.”” The American pulls the fly out and starts drinking the beer. The Irishman […]

  • Drunk Guy

    “A man walks into a bar and starts pouring down the beers. Burp. Having had one too many, the man was beginning to display an ugly side. An unescorted female sat down beside him and he whispered to her, “”Hey ! How about it babe? You and me?”” As she got up to move, he […]

  • What Time Does The Bar Open?

    ” What Time Does The Bar Open? At 3 am a desk clerk at a hotel gets a call from a drunk guy asking what time the bar opens. “”It opens at noon,”” answers the clerk. About an hour later he gets a call from the same guy, sounding even drunker. “”What time does the […]

  • The Wife

    “Oedipus A man walks into a bar and tells the bartender he dares have only one beer. The bartender asks him what the problem is, and he replies “”The last time I came in drunk at 3:00 A.M. my wife was so bent out of shape we damn neared ended up in divorce court.”” The […]

  • People say the funniest things when they’re drunk

    “People say the funniest things when they’re drunk A drunk staggers into a bar and says to the bartender, “”I’d like to buy everyone in the bar a drink and get one for yourself too!”” The bartender makes the drinks and everyone raises their glass and yells “”CHEERS!”” and downs their drinks. The bartender says […]