Blonde One Liners

“I met this girl, and I knew she was a true blonde because:
* She sent me a fax with a stamp on it!
* She thought a quarterback was a refund.
* She tripped over the cordless phone.
* She put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to
makeup her mind.
* She told someone to meet her at the corner of WALK and
DON’T WALK
* She took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
* At the bottom of the application where it says “”sign here””,
she put Sagittarius
* If she spoke her mind, she’d be speechless.
* When she heard that 90% of all crimes were around the home,
she moved.
* Did you hear about the blonde that got an AM radio? It
took her months to figure out she could use it at night.
* What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of
the YMCA?
“”Look! They spelled MACY’S wrong!””
* Why did the blonde stare at the frozen orange juice?
Because it said “”concentrate””
* Why can’t blondes take coffee breaks? They’re too hard
to retrain.
* What do you call 9 blondes standing in a circle? A dope
ring.
* Why can’t blondes be pharmacists? Because they can’t fit
the bottle in the typewriter.
* What’s the definition of eternity? 4 blondes at a 4-way
stop.
* What do you call five blondes at the bottom of the ocean?
An air pocket.
* What do you call a basement full of blondes? A whine cellar.
* Why do blondes have TGIF on their shirts? “”This goes in
front””

Did you hear about the blonde who died drinking
milk?
The cow fell on her.”

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