A Guy Walks Into A Bar With His Pet Monkey

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while

he’s drinking it, the monkey jumps round all over the place.

The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some

limes and eats them; he then jumps onto the pool table, grabs the cue

ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole.

The bartender screamed at the guy, “”Did you see what your monkey just


“”No, what?”” said the guy.

“”He just ate the cue ball off my pool table…whole!”” said the bartender.

Yeah, that doesn’t surprise me”” replied the patron.

“”He eats everything in sight, the little jerk.

I’ll pay for the cue ball and stuff.”” He finished his drink, paid the


and left the bar.

Two weeks later, he’s in the bar again and he has his monkey with him.

He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around.

While the man is finishing his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino

cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it.

The bartender is disgusted.

“”Did you see what your monkey did now?”” he asks.

“”Now what?”” inquires the patron.

“”Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, then pulled it out and

ate it.”” says the barkeeper.

“”Yeah, that doesn’t surprise me,”” replied the guy. “”He still eats

everything in sight, but ever since he swallowed that cue ball, he

measures everything first!””

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