Drinks

“NEW MIXED DRINKS CONTEST WINNERS
With no further ado, here the names are, in alphabetical
order. Which one do you think was THE winner?

Absolut Zero………….Absolut vodka over frozen nitrogen
Alexander the Grrreat….Gin, creme de cacao, and sweet cream over corn flakes
American in Paris……..Kentucky bourbon and champagne
Black Sabbath…………Kahlua and Mogen David wine
Blind Faith…………..Wood alcohol and sacramental wine
Blood Clot……………Vodka, tomato juice, and Jell-O
Bloody Awful………….Vodka and ketchup
Blue Moon…………….Corn whiskey and Aqua Velva
Coleman Cooler………..White wine, soda, fried chicken crumbs, and sand
Fuzzy Naval Base………Peach schnapps, orange juice, and ammonia
George Bush…………..George Dickel bourbon and Busch beer
Gorbachev…………….Vodka with a splash of port wine
Honeydew the Dishes……Midori and Dawn
Marie Antoinette………Bourbon, cake mix, and flat beer
Martinizer……………Gin, vermouth, and carbon tetrachloride
Mary Poppins………….Vodka, tomato juice, and a spoonful of sugar,
decorated with a paper umbrella
Mexican Hairless………Tequila and Minoxidil
Oil of Ole……………Mazola and Sangria
Peter, Paul, and Mary….Potassium nitrate, Paul Masson wine, and tomato juice
Phillips’ Screwdriver….Vodka, orange juice, and milk of magnesia
Port in a Storm……….Red wine and rainwater
Quack Doctor………….Cold duck and Dr. Pepper
A Rum with a View……..Bacardi and Visine
Rum-Pole of the Bailey…Bacardi rum, Popov vodka, and Bailey’s Irish Cream
Sake-to-me……………Rice wine, punch, and nitrous oxide
Scotch Tapeworm……….Dewar’s and Mescal
Shipwreck…………….Cutty Sark on the rocks
Shirley MacLaine………Sugar, carbonated water, ginger, syrup,
and pomegranate (what ginger ale and grenadine were
in a previous life)
Short Wave……………Ripple in a shot glass
Sinead O’Connor……….Irish whiskey and Nair
Skid Roe……………..Muscatel and caviar
Sour Kraut……………Schnapps and lemon juice
Sundae Driver…………Vodka, orange juice, and ice cream
Tequila Mockingbird……Jose Cuervo and birdseed
Three Men and a Baby…..Jim Beam, Jack Daniel’s, Johnny Walker, and Enfamil
Three Mile Island……..Vodka, gin, rum, tequila, and plutonium

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