Attempted Suicide


A blonde hurries into the hospital emergency room late one
night with the tip of her index finger shot off.

“”How did this happen?”” the emergency room doctor asked her.

“”Well, I was trying to commit suicide,”” the blonde replied.
“”What?”” sputtered the doctor. “”You tried to commit suicide
by shooting off the tip of your finger?””

“”No, silly!”” the blonde said. “”First I put the gun to my
chest, and I thought: “”I just paid $6000 for these breast
implants, I’m not shooting myself in the chest.””

“”So, then?”” asked the doctor.
“”Then I put the gun in my mouth, and I thought, “”I just paid
$3000 to get my teeth straightened, I’m not shooting myself
in the mouth.””

“”So, then?”” asked the doctor.

“”Then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: This is going to
make a loud noise, so I put my finger in the other ear before
I pulled the trigger.”””

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