New Diet

” ~~~ Low-Stress Diet Plan ~~~

The reason most diets fail is that the dieter has no “”release”” from
their strict routine, and as a result will cheat and actually gain
weight!
This causes imeasurable stress to their physical and emotional well
being.
The following diet was scientifically balanced to overcome this barrier:

BREAKFAST:
1/2 grapefruit
1 slice whole wheat toast
8 oz glass skim milk

LUNCH:
4 oz lean broiled chicken breast
1 cup steamed zucchini
1 Oreo cookie

MID-AFTERNOON SNACK:
The rest of the package of Oreo cookies
(Break in two first, see below)
1 quart Rocky Road ice cream
1 jar hot fudge
Nuts, Cherries, Whipped Cream, etc…

DINNER:
2 loaves garlic bread
1 large pepperoni & mushroom pizza
1 2-liter bottle of pop
3 Milky Way candy bars
1 entire cheesecake

REPEAT DAILY UNTIL DESIRED RESULTS ARE OBTAINED.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The following guidelines will assist your progress:

1. If no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.
2. If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, they cancel each
other out.
3. When eating with someone else, calories don’t count if you both
eat the same amount.
4. Foods used for medicinal purpose have no calories. These include
any chocolate used for energy, brandy, cheesecake, and ice cream.
5. Late-night snacks have no calories. The refrigerator light is
not bright enough for the calories to see their way into the
calorie counter.
6. Cookie pieces contain no calories, because breakage causes the
calories to leak out.
7. There are no calories in food eaten from someone else’s plate.
8. Movie related snacks are much lower in calories because they are
part of the entertainment, and not one’s personal fuel.
9. If you are in the process of preparing something, food licked off
utensils have no calories. Examples: Peanut Butter on a
knife and ice cream on a spoon.

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